Dear Ms. Palin:
Regardless, I have a small proposal for you to consider. I realize that it's unorthodox to print it here and publish it on the Internet, but after all it is 2010 so I beg your indulgence. How else can I get your attention?
The proposal: How about you pay me $50,000 before your next "speech" and I will write it for you. I am an excellent writer. I know grammar and sentence structure. I know how to construct a paragraph. I had an elite, liberal education, and I have a graduate degree, and I've written books, but I won't tell anyone that. I know how to write. And I'll keep it simple so your audience will follow it perfectly.
I assure you the speech I write for you will be (1) far more whacked out than the one you gave in Nashville, (2) far more clever (you might be tempted to say "cleverer"), and (3) your supporters, all those superannuated, semi and fully retired, more or less rich, white folks, will really love it. They will have something that is akin to an orgasm when you deliver my speech. Only it won't be an actual orgasm, they'll just smile and hyperventilate and cheer a lot. And want to smoke afterward.
You know how to reach me.
PS. I can see Uranus from here.
Etiquetas: sarah palin (the great huntress)